We were drunk by 12:30... which normally i don't think i would be super comfortable with but i've known Sabrina for 10 years, so she gets to get away with things that others don't. i was super grumpy the day before and had thought about cancelling when a friend of mine reminded me that i had been waiting to see Sabrina naked for all of that 10 years!! which along with the wine at 11am, made me super excited for the shoot. and as hoped, it was awesome. i thought being intoxicated would just loosen me us and make it easier to be in a vulnerable position (which it did), but it did something else also, that i think levelled it all out. it made me way more nervous about what Sabrina was going to do (knowing that she was in a similarly loosened state). this is the part where i'm supposed to write "she got me drunk and took advantage of me while i couldn't see!". but that's not at all true (except for the bite mark i left the shoot with...). it was a blast. ridiculous and loud and awesome. although i fucked up for a whole section of the shoot... you know how flashes have a max shutter sync? and how if you go over that you start to catch the shutter in your frame? yeah, well handling your camera when blindfolded and drunk sometimes results in shutter speeds upwards of 1/250th, but i'm just gonna go with it! some people have even said they like it! so there.

i know, i know, i shot a fucking boy! and i shot one naked! i was totally nervous. because he was a boy, yes, because he's totally cute, yes, and because i had met him less than two weeks before the shoot. when i first started this project, or rather, first started thinking about it, i was thinking that the best way to go about this big experiment was to shoot people i knew well, people i had a pre-existing connection with. if part of this was going to be about pushing that connection and pushing our own boundaries i thought it would be more successful if i chose to interact with people where i certain level of comfort was already established. maybe this was just me trying to make it easier to put myself in a vulnerable position, or maybe not, i don't remember honestly. i just really can't fathom why i wouldn't let myself dive right into this dynamic with a stranger. to be fair, i bonded pretty quickly with jimmeh, and by the time we were talking about shooting, i didn't feel like i would be shooting a stranger. which is exactly how it felt. outside of that couple of minutes before sliding the blindfold over my face, and the first few minutes of it (which are both places where i feel super awkward!), it was all comfort. really it was an hour of awesome discussions about community and sex and kink... and 90s dance music (at one, it was acknowledged that 90's dance music makes him take off his clothes... i think i died a little on the inside!) . of course, i was crazy aware of the boy that could have been at any stage of undress (and any distance from me), and wildly curious about what surprises were await me on the CF card. and oh the surprises! meet Crotchadile!!

January was interesting. and overall not as productive as i wanted it to be. but alas, we are not in february and i do not wish to dwell! i was working on One of the blindfold shoots i did recently and had a thought, what if i started blogging a blindfold diary? i am embarking (or have embarked already) on a photographic adventure. it is meant to be an experiment, and an exploration. most people who do these kinds of things on a regular basis like to keep track of their progress, so why shouldn't i? and hell, why not publicly. So welcome to something i hope will become a regular feature here, The blindfold diary. or maybe log, the blindfold log? i hate the word diary... ooh ooh chronicle! the blindfold chronicle! i know its dorky, but fucking better than diary.

I shot my first blindfold shoot a while back. i wish i had thought to write this down earlier, as i feel like it may end up being the most interesting one. you always remember your first time right? it was definitely one of the most interesting photographic experiences i feel like i've ever had. i feel like i should preface this - if you haven't read the statement about what the blindfold project is, go do it now! done that? good, back to me. This was the first time I'd ever shot Amber. something i think we both found to be strange as we've known each other for years now. in honour of this and the awkwardness that can exist during peoples first shoot (both for me and for them), we decided not to just jump into the blindfold project. every time i shoot someone new (especially naked) there is a good chunk of time that must be dedicated to getting them comfortable in front of the camera, this is ridiculous time. there was a ladder involved. it was fun and totally fine and i think there may even have been some good stuff in there, but that wasn't hugely my intent with that time. after spending a good chunk of time getting comfy, we dove in. and holy fuck, did everything shift. i felt Amber become more comfortable, even just through the conversation we were having (which i hope is true, cause otherwise i don't know what i felt...), but even more than that, i felt me shift. i got awkward and uncomfortable and super vulnerable. it was great. i really had no idea whether or not what i thought would happen would. i had no idea that i would have guessed right, that the power dynamic would be totally fucked with. but it was. and to speak purely from my point of view, it was massively fucked with. i've had my fair share of blindfolded experiences in my life, but had thought that maybe when taken out of a sexual scenario it would seem less vulnerable. not true. and it was hot. i don't know if that was because of the nature of our conversion or something specific about my dynamic with Amber, but i totally found it to be and exciting experience. maybe i was just more aware of the various kinds of tension in attendance... regardless, i left the shoot deeming it a successful experiment, and an excellent project. and maybe someday (in the book that intend to make) you can here what Amber thought of it.

Also, i am keeping my favourite shots for the book. so really, this is all just a giant teaser! 

I'm on a big business productivity kick. i think it's me trying to counteract the i'm-getting-a-year-older-and-i'm-not-where-i-wanted-to-be time of year. hence the re-doing of the parts of the site (hint hint) and now the creation of a pdf portfolio. i haven;t entirely figured out the purpose yet, but should i figure that out i'll have it ready and waiting! it was also a fun indesign experiment, as i never use indesign. you can download it here! feel free to send it on to folks too!